Misogyny and more!
It seems that the only females I can trust these days are the ones that are blood relatives. All the rest seem to just walk all over me. I don't do anything bad to them...not intentionally, anyway. Let's just say that someone that I cared for--who I thought similarly cared for me--did one of those Mortal Kombat moves where she rips out your heart and eats it. Figuratively speaking, of course. Well, with all the crap that I have to deal with at work in addition to this newest development, I feel that I'm just becoming more jaded to the world--hardening my heart at a faster rate than ever. I'm seeming to focus on caring about myself more than ever. For example, when I walked past a dirty beggar today in Santa Cruz, my initial emotional reaction was one of contempt, which is unprecedented since I usually at least feel sorry for the guys. And then I felt happy that that wasn't me on the tattered sleeping bag. No altruism in my heart or mind anywhere. I'm thinking that I want to continue down this path some more. See where it takes me. In my mind, I think it will better suit me to cope with the world, which is in no way similar to the idealistic image I always had in mind. Damn. I'm more angst ridden than a teenager. Aren't I getting old for this?
posted by anthony fuego @ 8:23 PM
1 Comments:
Welcome to the SA club (selfish-anonymous). We're always trying to recruit new members...
Girls can be such, ehem, jerks. Glad your job situation is looking up and you are back to posting. I was getting impatient (but I suppose that's why I'm part of the SA's).
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